My Time to Write

Ecclesiastes 3:1
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven...

After all the struggles of jobs fallen through and plans not going as expected, that what I'm thinking: that God's got an amazing plan up His sleeve and He's just not ready to reveal it yet. That or He is revealing it to me and I'm simply to human (ie: impatient, stupid, etc.) to notice.

So, I've decided that I need to start paying more attention, and that includes spending a little more time with God and a little less time creating my own plans and then getting depressed when they don't "work." However, that does not mean that I'm just sitting on my balcony, with Bible in hand, thinking, "Okay, God. Do something. Show me what I'm to do."

It's like that analogy I heard once at church a long time ago:

Think of yourself as a car. You can sit there, all out of fuel, thinking and hoping that God's going to pick you up and move you, but that won't happen because you haven't used free choice to fill yourself up...You are just expecting God to do all the work. But, this is a two-way relationship between you and God. So, you have to fill yourself up with fuel (faith) and start driving. God will "direct you path."

So, I've focused on God more and I'm doing my part. And, when the right thing comes along, it'll be from God. But in the meantime, I'm not moping around in my apartment. I'm keeping as busy as a can. I've been spending my free time writing (which is something I've been dying to have the time for), going on long nature walks (If that doesn't turn your thoughts to God, not much else can. Nature's a miracle of creation to me!), keeping my eye and ear out for a job, and enjoying my time spent with Adam and all the guys upstairs and the girls downstairs. Last night, for instance, we played a killer game of Clue and I made a batch of devil's food cupcakes...and we all got adventurous and used the mysterious canned icing in the fridge. We didn't die from it, so I guess it was still good!? Then, we all sat out on the guys balcony and just chatted, and well, watched people in the building across from us. It was a great night!

Well, I couldn't tell you if I'll be able to stay here for the rest of the summer, or, if because of my lack of funds, I'll have to move back home and not go to school in the fall (I can't afford the $450 resistration fee due in four days). But, since God is Lord and He's the one holding my life in His hands, then I've nothing to worry about...

...So, I just go with His flow.

His "flow" is good.